My Ambition (like a primary school essay, but with 18+ content)

"What's your ambition?" is a popular question from adults to kids in order to find out what they're thinking with regard to their future (and it also reflects their level of maturity cause answers like 'fireman' and 'accountant' differ greatly in level of reasoning.)

oh btw, my brother's ambition when he was around 5 or 6 was a fire engine. haha, random recollection.

and so today, i'm proud to say i have an ambition! it's not totally prospective and not based on how much i can earn, but what i like to do / feel like learning. and someone shares the ambition with me too, Qing! haha. it's owning a pub or bar (maybe club for him haha), where WE will help out with the bartending, serving EXOTIC drinks of exquisite novelty. then I (and hopefully my band if i get one by then haha) will be the houseband and provide our bar/pub/club with a variety of chill music, genres ranging from jazz to blues to country to alternative. then Qing and whatever crew he may have in the future will share the stage throughout the week providing dance entertainment! so it's like we co-own the pub/bar/club yet help out doing what we love, also allowing us to save cost hiring dudish helpers!

quite a random (and for some maybe even immature or unrealistic) thought but it's pretty well thought out for now huh, about the mix between interest and work. other details like design aren't usually important for such random thoughts. i don't daydream.

anyway, it was Yongwen's birthday yesterday, went down to give / show face. saw him drink power shots haha, Black Absinthe, Flaming Dr. Pepper and Waterfall, all quite hardcore yet very pleasing to the eye (preparation involved fire and colourful mixes of alcohol and other ingredients like milk or sugar). the whole event seemed like a 'de-virginization' of Yongwen's drinking life the moment he became legal haha, quite an eyeful. 3 shots of exotic drinks cost the dudes who paid for it over a hundred bucks and Yongwen was high, however, he wasn't wasted which obviously shows he ain't no virgin to begin with yesterday haha.

came home, slept at 4am and overslept frisbee this morning with Phelan & Gabriel & dudes. supposed to go town for photohunt with Nwahs & Gab & Pao til night but since Nwahs woke up with a fever, the whole thing was cancelled too haha, wasted but it's okay it will materialise some other time i'm sure. so Ww came over for a nap ._. til 7 where we went for dinner at j8 with Hx, Phelan & Shawn Lau at Food Junction where the food was funking ex and that's pretty much what you need to know about my life today.

28/12/08, 12:18am.

Give Thanks to Allah!

i'm hooked onto a new song on Jesus' birthday, Give Thanks to Allah by Michael Jackson.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UT6sfkVtwbI

Give thanks to Allah,
for the moon and the stars
prays in all day full,
what is and what was
take hold of your iman
dont givin to shaitan
oh you who believe please give thanks to Allah.
Allahu Ghefor Allahu Rahim Allahu yuhibo el Mohsinin,
hua Khalikhone hua Razikhone whahoa ala kolli sheiin khadir

Allah is Ghefor Allah is Rahim Allah is the one who loves the Mohsinin,
he is a creater, he is a sistainer and he is the one who has power over all.

Give thanks to Allah,
for the moon and the stars
prays in all day full,
what is and what was
take hold of your iman
dont givin to shaitan
oh you who believe please give thanks to Allah.
Allahu Ghefor Allahu Rahim Allahu yuhibo el Mohsinin,
hua Khalikhone hua Razikhone whahoa ala kolli sheiin khadir

Allah is Ghefor Allah is Rahim Allah is the one who loves the Mohsinin,
he is a creater, he is a sistainer and he is the one who has power over all.

well though Christmas this year wasn't all religious as it used to be for me in the past, it wasn't too bad cause of the meetings i had with family, relatives, friends and acquaintances for the past few hours. went over to Jj's house at around 9pm, before finding Tim, Zx, Toons, Ted, Ww, Dam & Elson at Tim's place and spent a short while there. Shawn & Russell came afterward too, but Hx, Phelan & I went back to Jj's house just when it hit around 12 midnight. spent the night at his place with ODAC dudes before zaozaozaoing at 7am on X'mas morning. went home to shower and nap for a while before going for 11am mass, then lunch at Auntie Agnes' place. napped again at home after lunch before going to Pao's house for dinner with Ww, Gabriel & Phelan. the food was good. but then again, food was good all the way since last night!

anyway, Merry Christmas to one and all, but as you may feel me just as i feel myself, this Christmas wasn't about giving or receiving for me - little present exchanges (i only bought gifts for houses i was going to, and my Grandmother), but more social interaction and that opened me up to a whole new meaning of Christmas. one that means that Christmas is not about gifts and possessions earnt, but more of awesome company and expanding social circles in times of joy. party! someday when i've got cash, the the ultimate X'mas of gifts & friends (& maybe even God) shall come!

25/12/08, 11:22pm.

how do you wash your ears?

an interesting thought while i was bathing today...
i only soap whatever is neck down (apart from pubic hair).
i only shampoo whatever is neck up (and pubic hair).
i only use facial wash on my face.
then what happen to the ears? to use body soap, shampoo or facial wash?
OR YOU DON'T WASH YOUR EARS EEEYER.
i use body soap most of the time.

tmr (and the day after) is quite complex a day. here's the plan:
2pm: Altar Boys' Committee Meeting (i don't know for what and what am i doing there)
3+/4pm: Pool w/ Chad, Josh, Terence, Daniel & extra buddies (that's prolly why i go for the meeting before this)
6+/7pm: Family X'mas Dinner
8+/9pm: Jj's House Party w/ 1t23, ODAC Dudes & Jj's Family (Tim's House halfway then come back) + Stayover
(next morning)
7am: Head Home for Wash Up + Rest
11am: X'mas Mass
12pm: Lunch @ Auntie Agnes' House w/ Relatives

ok have a happy Christmas guys!

today, went church in the morning for trng on X'mas day masses, then had lunch before gg over to VSEOW'S HOUSE FOR ROCKBAND HAHAHAHAH damn fun sia even tho it's just 3 ppl but we had fun nevertheless. went for dinner with her at Simpang aft tht - i had a thick and fat piece of Mutton Murtabak and couldn't finish it cause it was crazy. then met Nig at town for couple of drinks and chill time where we chatted from crazy shit to really theoretical and philosophical stuff acting like wise old bastard when we're just young naive fucks trying to be cool. so when we realised how lame we were we headed home but hey, i learnt alot from it, both of him and myself.

mabe i should have such act wise talks with everyone so i can learn more about everyone and also find out as much i can about myself til i know myself better than God but hey that's not possible so dream on.

ok now really, have a happy Christmas guys. don't get too drunk then too horny!

24/12/08, 1:07am.

spoil

this is damn spoil. my mother say this week different from other week so no need a lot of money, so i just got 20$ for this week and i spent 10$ alr today. damn sure cannot live properly this week and i'm still in debt...

22/12/08, 11:04pm.

when a little delay puts you off so bad

this morning, i was supposed to run Mt. Rosie with Syam at 8:30am, but i overslept so he ran himself. then i was supposed to meet Gabriel and Phelan at 1pm for a swim but cause of rain in different parts of Sg at different times, we delayed it til 2:30 but mis-comm to stupid Gabriel and we met with him not knowing we were swimming. so we couldn't swim and went to play arcade and eat ice cream til Ww came.

when Ww came, we went to Queensway and Ikea where Phelan and Gab wanted to see shoes and Ww wanted to buy a showcase for his Star Wars figurine collection. that pretty much was my day which reduced many activities to none because of delay.

lesson learnt for me: don't oversleep.
lesson learnt for Gabriel: be smarter.

22/12/08, 8:51pm.

when you do something you don't really give a shit about, with extra enthusiasm

haven't posted photos in a while,
so here's one, with the 'odd-one-out' theme :)

have you ever gone for a concert of a band you don't really know, yet try to and actually do enjoy yourself immensely at the event itself?

have you ever hung out with a friend you aren't really familiar with, yet because of boredom, attempt and successfully fill your time with a fruitful bonding person with that person?

many a times we do not care much about something, but because we have to do it (either come across it by chance or are forced to do it), we try to put in our best effort in order to make the most of the situation, and i met with that incident today, at a live soccer match.

the above may sound cliche but i really don't knw how else to say what i just did, especially in Singlish cause ah bengs don't have such thoughts. well anyway, you get my point and that's whats most important. i went to the Singapore / Vietnam AFF Suziki Cup 2008 Semi-Finals with Wee Seng, Clinton, Johan, Wen Bin, Hao Nam and CS today, and while i usually don't give two-shits (can't say one-shit cause i do, to a certain extent, give a shit about soccer) about the sport, i had the chance to catch the match at the National Stadium today for a nominal sum of 2$ so that pretty much bought my night.

now since soccer doesn't mean much to me, i would just watch the match then kthxbye guys and go to bed at home, but i was at the National Stadium, so suddenly from my two-shits about soccer, it became some twenty-shits cause of the atmosphere there. it's different from learning about it from your friends, reading the papers or watching it on tv cause through those mediums, you only learn what happened, and how it happened. bye bye to your friend, close the papers, switch off the tv and it's all over, nothing much.

however, when you actually experience the match live, you know WHY whatever happens, happens - why you cheer so enthusiastically, why the crowd reacts so vibrantly, why the players behave how they do. moreover, you can't just walk away from the match similar to the bo-chup way you would after watching it on tv, cause the outcome of the match determines your mood, as well as the others around you. you can't be glee when your country just lost and everyone around you is still furious about the game. thus, from being at the game, you actually involve yourself in a situation you seldom ever would, and therefore enjoy yourself in a way you would not usually do. so main point is, you will force yourself (though not really with alot of force) to enjoy the event you do not usually care about once you are put in the situation of not having any other choice other than to partake in it. sounds complicated? i just mean that it is different from what you normally experience when you take yourself a step further and involve yourself in what you usually only spectate. then, it's a whole new level for you even if you don't want it.

ok the above can be long and boring to you so please do not read it but if you're here, i guess you alr have, so too bad. anw, other than the enjoying myself even though i didn't really try to part, the match was pretty okay, not good cause Sg didn't win (0-1) due to poor form and fucking dirty Viets and not bad cause the spirit was awesome with everyone cheering for the same purpose. went for dinner before the match at Sumo House and then supper with a few of the lot after the match at some random coffee shop at Clarke Quay. thus, i just reached home and bathed only.

ok now what's for tmr? pretty much. run with Syam at 8:30am around Mt. Rosie, then lunch with nobody then swim with Gabriel after lunch. after that it's happy time with Gabriel and camera, most prolly with Ww at Ikea, so its cameratime with Ww & Gab @ Ikea. ok tmr's quite hectic so i'm going to carry many things with me to many places!

22/12/08, 1:00am.

the inability to think for our parent's sakes and pockets

you buy what you need, that's what they used to say a long time ago when i shopped.

you buy what you like, that's what they used to say not so long ago.

you buy what you need, like and don't like also can, that's not what they say now though it's what my brother does.

i'm not jealous like he thinks i am (of course i will be a little jealous, where got brother see parents buy you 3X the amount of things than they bought for him will not jealous, it's just human), i'm just thinking on behalf of our parents and the shallower-than-before pockets they now have, but he just doesn't get it cause he's ignorant and selfish - 'why you complain so much, are you jealous?'

on top of buying 3 shirts, 2 jeans, 1 shorts and a bag on the Malaysia trip two days ago, he bought a new handphone which was quite really ugly but costs $198, may not be a lot to some, but can be considered quite a lot for a upgrade-your-plan phone. when i told him it was ugly, he said i again was jealous, but mother and sister said the same regarding the phone's looks haha. and he was supposed to pay for the phone himself but i think he's gonna keep quiet about it till dad doesn't bother collecting the money anymore.

i'm not grumbling about him here even though i don't like him pretty openly haha, but my point here is that with someone who spends like that and gives a shit attitude when you try to put a good point across doesn't deserve any sympathy or charity. but in fact deserves to be punished for whatever flaws he has cause he doesn't seem to change over time. he has to learn how to treasure what he has, and draw a fine line between what's needed and what's not. by the way, my parents only reprimand him for whatever shit he does, like washing the pair of jeans once every 2 wears (when jeans are supposed to last long times haha which are like 3-4 weeks for me and longer for others), they don't punish him or make sure he learns. that's why my brother remains a bastard for the most of the time, and is my friend for the minority of the time i see him.

i'm not busteding him here, but i hope everyone learns from whatever he is not and maybe can relate to me on similar members of the family you really wish to kick in the ass but can't cause of family manners and 'appropriate' respect. there are a lot more things i am not very contended with reference to him, but it's just long and naggy to talk about it here, you can tell me if you want to know about it, i surely tell you in face. many things about his uncountable bad habits, his gay sexuality etc.

imma go play some guitar now and i really want to become better. but saying like this is not going to work.

20/12/08, 11:31pm.

i'm an AIDS bastard

i've got the bedbugs rash infection which began at y camp so i went to see doctor today then went down to collect reimbursement for my consultation fees and medication, cause it was all covered under the ymca insurance when we signed up for the camp.

anyway, the rash is bad, with it reaching my ears, ankles and face apart from the usual back, arms, neck thing. i hope it cures quickly cause of the doc's jab i took today.

went phototaking with Nig then dinner with Ww, Pao, Gab & Phelan aft tht. ok nice day to you guys too bye i'm tired i want to sleep but i need to count my coins cause i got no notes left to spend. :(

19/12/08, 10:19pm.

Malaysia and AJ match day

hello today Cjc vs Ajc, but i didn't play cause i went to JB with Gabriel and family! i bought 3 shirts - 2 polos and 1 lumberjack (counterfeit looking one) and am quite happy but at the same time unhappy cause i wanted a vintage wash jeans as well as a brown corduroy trousers. that have to be searched for in Singapore now.

my brother, on the other hand, is over the moon cause he bought 3 shirts 2 jeans and 1 berms. plus 1 bag too. sure damn happy while everyone else was okay happy only. however Gabriel didn't buy anything but i hope he enjoyed himself waiting for me, playing arcade, eating junk and wasting time for an entire day in Malaysia, as well as leeching food from my family, but i think we're all more than happy to provide for you for a day, and for anyone else too!

most retardedly, i didn't take any photos even though i had my camera with me the entire day and a photobuddy with me too. for a brief report of this morning's match and a lesson learnt on online weather forecasts, please follow http://yourbeautyinapicture.wordpress.com, Freddie's blog.

imma going to bathe now cause i've got rash.

18/12/08, 10:18pm.

the Paolo's house

hihihi i'm blogging from Paolo's house here in Bishan which is so close to Cat High and i used to walk past here like everyday on my way to the bus stop home! if i had known that this apartment was his house in the past, i would have shouted something everytime i walked past for the past 10 years of short pants life. haha so here we are having a fun time with his Xbox 360, then we're going to watch either 21 or The Mist and then the other one after. and slot in supper at Kway Chap somewhere in between.

wish me fun and happiness and there's trng tmr which Fred and i ain't gg for. then there's match against Aj on Thurs which we may be / may not be going for depending on whether we choose to play the match or go Malaysia with family and Gabriel. so we shall see, if tmr rains then Thurs won't rain then can play match and vice versa! but i hope it rains on Thurs so match will be postponed and i can have the best of both worlds.

you know, there are many things i want to achieve this lifetime, one of them is to spot many different hairstyles throughout the various times of my life. the afro, dreadlocks and cornrows are all weirder hairstyles i wna do someday apart from the usual buzzcut or shoulder-length hair. i won't do a moehawk or anything that requires arrangement in the morning cause i ain't gna do it - i tried doing things that needed preparation in the morning and i couldn't make myself do it, so it's gna be hairstyles i can get and keep that way for a long time without doing much to it! hair, so fun to play!

Pao's tablet pc keyboard quite nice to type on siol.

16/12/08, 11:19pm.